just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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