fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
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