problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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