She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
