I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
