I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I just gargled with NyQuil
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
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