i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
