So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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