My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
