I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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