who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
