I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
