watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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