I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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