Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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