do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize