she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
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