Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize