How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
