big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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