so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize