i barfeds in our rink
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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