No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
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I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
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He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed