Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos