I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Green mimosas i think yes
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize