Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
