woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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