That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
