is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
