Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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