Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
