The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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