Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos

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  (630): I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos! (317): Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto? (630): Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos http://tfl.nu/vb21
  Replies (20) Good night (2582) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after

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  (508): Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after http://tfl.nu/akdp
  Replies (50) Good night (4652) Bad night (744)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  what did you do?

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i asked her out. that's so hot.

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  (203): she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex. (860): what did you do? (203): i asked her out. that's so hot. http://tfl.nu/dg3d
  Replies (56) Good night (9589) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap

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  (425): Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap http://tfl.nu/z2b9
  Replies (18) Good night (5370) Bad night (665)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday

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  (518): i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday http://tfl.nu/uz0x
  Replies (10) Good night (3015) Bad night (877)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.

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  (270): It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj. http://tfl.nu/3mtz
  Replies (13) Good night (4883) Bad night (850)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.

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  (207): He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ. http://tfl.nu/rtl1
  Replies (25) Good night (9457) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now

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  (913): Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now http://tfl.nu/wp4u
  Replies (35) Good night (7414) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.

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  (920): I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters. http://tfl.nu/cy91
  Replies (2) Good night (2124) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?

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  (850): My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans? (1-850): It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it? http://tfl.nu/e1h9
  Replies (5) Good night (1867) Bad night (1297)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.

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  (313): Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had. http://tfl.nu/aqg4
  Replies (0) Good night (1197) Bad night (475)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership

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  (256): I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership http://tfl.nu/f2mt
  Replies (7) Good night (971) Bad night (480)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.

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  (248): It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk. http://tfl.nu/m630
  Replies (7) Good night (1327) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.

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  (425): I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me. http://tfl.nu/601h
  Replies (5) Good night (251) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?

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  (713): Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why? http://tfl.nu/s3mv
  Replies (4) Good night (431) Bad night (224)

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