omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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