I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize