I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
