scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
