Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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