Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
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