They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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