Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize