For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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