do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
