ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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