He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
