Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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