I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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