I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I queefed so loud it echoed.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
