I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
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