I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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