Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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