I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
